I remember my first year so vividly. I remember the first day, when I moved in. Such high expectations and a smile that was so wide you’d have thought I couldn’t actually close my mouth. I remember writing everything I wanted to do when I got my offer- circling all the bits around campus I wanted to see, all the clubs and societies I wanted to join and all the other cool things I had read about. I wanted to join cheerleading, play tennis, be part of the fashion society, be the ACS (afri-cultural society) president and be a member of every food society. You could say I had dreams. I’d say I had goals- goals I had set for myself carefully and strategically. Do you have goals? Not dreams (though they are pretty similar), but goals that you want to achieve?
Not so long into uni, I had registered into at least 2 clubs, 4 societies and I was already envisioning myself as the ACS president. Uni was fun! Better than what I had heard and thought it would be. Or at least that’s what I thought.
There was only one thing missing and I couldn’t place my hand on it. Have you ever had that feeling? Annoying isn’t it? Something keeps bugging you, it’s in your head somewhere but you don’t know how to say it or get it out, it’s just there.
It took me the whole of first year and then some, to find it and get it out of my head. It was God.
For over a year I was dilly-dallying in my relationship with God. It was something I knew I wanted; I just didn’t think I wanted it yet. Better still, needed it. But when I got to my second year, I didn’t just want or need God. I desired God. I craved His presence and when I felt it - the blissful, awesome, majestic, holy presence of God - I knew there was nothing in this life compared to that. I literally - in the full sense of the word - hit the jackpot.
I thought uni was fun then. When I met God was when I knew what fun was. You see, people get it wrong - they look for ‘fun’ in all the wrong places and think they know what life is. I know this because I went through it. But here’s the plot twist. Ever heard the phrase ‘It’s only fun till someone gets hurt’? That’s what happened to me; I was hurt and I didn’t even know it. I was hurting my heart, hurting my spirit, but most of all, I hurt God. You’d think a God so sovereign couldn’t be ‘hurt’ by some actions, but that’s where I missed it. God was hurt, deeply. All He wanted from the beginning was for me to realise that He was all I needed. Without realising it, I was looking for ‘God’ in all the wrong places. I knew I wanted something more out of life, but I didn’t know where it was, so I searched. In the clubs and the pubs, but never in the most oblivious place - within me. It wasn’t till I got worn out of partying and I had gone too many times in the same circle that I realised ‘This couldn’t be all there is to life.” I wanted more, and in that ‘more’ was when I quieted everyone else’s voice to listen to mine. A quote I read said ‘You don’t know the value of an anchor, till you’re in the storm.” Another phrase by a ‘Mama Maggie’ says -
‘Silence is the secret. Silence your heart to listen to your spirit. Silence your spirit to listen to His Spirit. In silence you leave many and be with the One…'
Could you believe that was all it took?
I’d love to share more with you but I think you get the message. And so, I leave you with these parting words and I can only plead that you hold on to them. No matter where you are on your walk with Christ, this is applicable.
• Find God early. I know how much of a difference my life would be if I found God in my first year. (& No, I’m not talking about ‘I-was-born-in-a-Christian-home so I know God) I mean find Him. Search within and find Him. Jer 29:13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. Once you get God, you get everything. Matt 6:33
• Create a friendship with Him. Okay, you’ve found God now what? Start talking to Him about everything. Offload your problems to Him; He is the friend that is ever present and cares deeply about you. He will not betray you and He will never forsake you. 1 Peter 5:7 says Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. ; Psalm 55:22 Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.
• Now you’ve found God and have Him as a friend, what next? Find or build a community of believers. Too often we see Christians easily backsliding into their old ways. To avoid this, (and this is something I’m especially striving towards) mind your associations. You might think you don’t have to do away with your old friends, (and I’m not saying you do). But you do have to know where to draw the line. You are in the world but not of the world. You might have to give up something to get something but hey, that’s how God works.
In conclusion, I can’t promise it’ll be easy but I can assure you it’ll be worth it. I wish you a glorious and blissful God-filled year ahead.
Peace & Love,
Thea xx
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